Katy and I were talking about what to write this week in the newsletter and I told her how conflicted I was about writing blog posts while still trying to listen and learn. I don’t want to create more noise in the conversation by trying to produce optics that support my beliefs, but I also don’t want people to question where I stand on important issues.
I have been, still am, and will be committed to the cause of racial equality – and I also believe it’s possible to engage through participation while letting others lead the way.
Public and Private
Publicly, we’ve spent the past week honoring other people’s narratives rather than our own. Because, it’s not about us, or our stories, or our feelings, or our experiences with racism. It’s not about what we know. It’s about what we don’t know. It’s about how much we have to learn.
So, we muted our IG feed/stories and put a hold on hosting our IG morning show. We’ll continue to stay out of the way so the most important issues can stay top of mind and tip of tongue.
Privately, we’ve grieved with hearts broken over those who have lost so much and still have such a long way to go before real equality exists.
We’ve learned more about what institutional racism looks like, why it’s embedded in our culture, and how it shows itself in subtle but sharp ways.
We’ve spent time with our clients and employees to contribute in whatever ways are most helpful.
We’ve talked with our kids about what racism and discrimination are, how it affects others, and what they can do about it when they feel it and see it.
And we’ve supported our friends and colleagues as they’ve struggled through the hard emotions that’ve surfaced over these past two weeks.
There’s a lot of turmoil in the wedding world right now. Social media is in an uproar over publications, blogs, educators, and event pros being exclusive instead of inclusive, close-minded instead of open-hearted. It’s sad.
But it’s necessary too. Because we all have a choice. In a world that feels so out of order, our ability to decide who we learn from and who we associate with is one of the few areas we can control.
If there’s one thing we can all be sure of it’s that public personas and private values do not always align.
I posted about this last year, and now’s a good reminder to make sure your values, beliefs, and ethics overlap with others. You may not get it right at first, but the more you know the more you’ll feel the need to act.
It’s never too late to make a change that moves your moral compass in the right direction for you.
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